current face

I have an obsession with blood, with the invisible past running through my veins and capillaries, pumping through my heart.

I want to untwist the skeins of my own DNA, unravel the path that has brought it to me.

I want to map my face, draw borders around each region of resemblance.

I am driven by a compulsion to uncover my past, to draw the lines that silently exist between my mothers and fathers and myself. It is, in the end, a selfish quest – this is not for posterity, but for me. I operate subconsciously under the notion that locating the source of by blood will lead me to myself, a presumption that most likely has its flaws. By uncovering the invisible, unconscious and secret journey I took through my ancestors to this place, to this amalgamation of their bodies, hearts and minds, I will in some measure discover my true self.

But it isn’t just that.

By renaming all those long forgotten faces, I repopulate the world. I invert the order and rebirth my progenitors. By naming, I recreate life out of long-quiet death and forgetfulness. I name, enumerate, remember and we all live again – their blood is not mute within mine.

By remembering, I form my own monument to those that made me. I owe them this much, to thank them, and to thank them by name.

(April 2003)

About rebeccafm

botanical gardens, ice cream, and family photos.


One thought on “

  1. this is so beautiful. SO beautiful.

    Posted by maggie and becky | July 18, 2007, 9:27 pm

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